Dear Murderous Crazies

austin-police

You’re probably sitting there ailing up your guns right now thinking that you’re gonna make yourself famous by going out into the world and shooting up some random people right? Well if that is what you’re thinking you’d be sadly mistaken. There are so many murderous crazies in the world right now that you’re probably gonna get 15 minutes worth of airtime before the entire world forgets who you are. Hardly worth getting yourself killed or imprisoned over. Even if you pick a certain type of person to execute whether it is cops, Whites, Blacks, non Muslims, whatever it has been done already a bunch of times.

Look I probably can’t talk you our of going on a murderous rampage so I’m not even going to try. You have gun you will kill blah blah blah whatever. Remember that guy who shot people from the clock tower? Yeah neither does anyone else.

So if you want to be remembered for shooting some people and of course everyone knows you do, why not kill people who really have it coming. No not the president you’d never get anywhere near him anyway I’m talking about communists.

America needs a hero and you have anger issues. Why not combine these things and actually make a difference? You could single handily put the fear of God into a bunch of well deserving scumbags while ensuring your proper place in history. Most of these idiots are entitled brats and foreigners anyway.

You know what the best part is? It would be like shooting ducks in a barrel. You could mow down a hundred people before you even had to reload. And guess what! Your carnage wouldn’t end there either. Think of the stampede that would occur while you’re grabbing your second round of clips. I bet another 100 people would get majorly fucked up just from the stampede alone. A couple of well placed explosives in the opposite direction in which you are shooting would change the direction of the herd back in your direction giving you a slaughter of epic proportions. No one is gonna forget that anytime soon or ever really.

So if you’re intent on going out and murdering a bunch of people make it count. Heck you don’t even have to be a good shot just spray the crowd. Plus you’d be doing a service for your country so a lot of people are going to see you are a hero. Hero and villain all at the same time. Doesn’t get better than that.

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